


Baby (You've got what it takes)

by misspronounced



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Bipolar Disorder, M/M, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-20
Updated: 2014-05-20
Packaged: 2018-01-25 19:59:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1660640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misspronounced/pseuds/misspronounced
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mickey will deny to his last dying breath that he uses pet names for Ian, and Ian knows that’s bullshit. On a daily basis, Mickey will throw out ‘sleepyface’, ‘firecrotch’, and Ian’s personal favorite “tough guy’. But Ian is almost positive that Mickey is unaware that he calls Ian ‘baby’ occasionally, but he doesn’t mention to Mickey because it is only in “emergency” situations. That’s what Ian thinks of them anyway. (4+1 deal)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Baby (You've got what it takes)

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so this is my very first post for this fandom. I've wanted to write something for his pairing because they are so special to me. So here's my attempt at writing them, and hope you guys like it! Was supposed to be a 5+1 thing, but I only managed 4+1, cause I couldn't think of another scenario and it was getting long. First four are angsty, then a happy ending. :)  
> Feedback would be much appreciated! 
> 
> (unbeta'd)

Mickey will deny to his last dying breath that he uses pet names for Ian, and Ian knows that’s bullshit. On a daily basis, Mickey will throw out ‘sleepyface’, ‘firecrotch’, and Ian’s personal favorite 'tough guy’. But Ian is almost positive that Mickey is unaware that he calls Ian ‘baby’ occasionally, but he doesn’t mention to Mickey because it is only in “emergency” situations. That’s what Ian thinks of them anyway. 

~~

It was right in the middle of the bar fight at the Alibi when Terry was too preoccupied fighting the guy that pulled him off Mickey, that he gave Mickey and Ian somewhat of a break. Mickey stood up and looked around for Ian and saw Kev point to the far corner where Ian was collapsed. 

After Ian tackled Mickey’s uncle, someone starting hitting him with a pool cue, hitting his head a few times making him dazed as he stumbled against the wall and let his legs give out and fell to the ground. Mickey rushed over to him, not giving a fuck now who saw. Once he got to Ian, he turned him onto his back revealing a bloody face and fluttering eyes. Ian let out a strangled groan and closes his eyes, he weakly reached for Mickey’s arm but it falls before he can make it to him. 

Mickey then has one hand on Ian’s face tilting it upward to him and the other supporting his neck. “Ian, Ian! Hey, hey you’re okay”, Mickey says in a rushed quiet voice that he only uses for Ian. Ian’s eyes only flutter in response, no sound, no other movement. 

Mickey is suddenly panicking. “Ian! Ian, look at me. Open your eyes, come on, please. Please be okay, alright?” Mickey’s voice is cracking and his eyes are blurry, now seeing only blood and red hair that matches. 

Ian tries his hardest to stay conscious and focus on Mickey’s voice, and all he wants to do is take the worry out of his voice. He grunts and groans to let Mickey know he’s still there, but can’t really feel his limbs. He feels Mickey squeeze his neck tighter and hears his words come out more rushed and louder.

“Hey, stay with me, Ian. You’re okay, tough guy, huh? You’re stronger than these fuckers. We won’t let them win,” Mickey said with confidence. Ian thought then that his response might have been slower than he thought because Mickey sounded panicked again, “No, no, no, Ian. You stay with me, you bastard. Ian. Baby, please…” Mickey was whispering by the end as he leaned his forehead against Ian’s. 

Then Ian finally coughed and opened his eyes to look at Mickey and lightly touch his face. Mickey pulled back and looked into Ian’s eyes with all the relief in the world. He helped Ian up and by then the cops had shown up and were just barely able to break up Terry and Mickey, who had a newfound rage and was literally ready to kill Terry. 

~~

It had been a couple of weeks since Ian found a stable regime of pills for his bi-polar disorder, and everything was almost back to normal. Even though Ian felt as normal as he thought he could be, Mickey couldn’t help feeling like he was still tiptoeing around him. The last thing Mickey wanted was to trigger something in Ian for him to fall into a depression again. 

One day when Ian was at home and Mickey came back from work, Svetlana ambushed Mickey as soon as he got through the door. 

“What you do to orangeboy?” Her voice impatient. 

“The fuck are you talking about? I’ve been at work all day, where you should have fuckin' been”, Mickey replied equally annoyed and now angry that he remembered that Svetlana hadn’t shown up to the Alibi at all.

“Orange boy woke up screaming, shouting ‘he don’t love me!’ Had to stay home and look after baby myself. He hasn’t left room since morning. This. Your fault!” Svetlana then pushed past him and went outside to smoke on the porch. 

At first Mickey was nothing but confused, trying to make sense of Svetlana’s ranting, since half of it was in Russian. Then Mickey thought back to last night and how he and Ian fucked twice, and nothing seemed off there. Mickey then fell asleep right after; tucked against Ian who may have been mumbling something that Mickey was too tired to listen to. It was early in the morning when Mickey woke up to get ready for work. He sat up and looked to see that Ian had his back facing him and breathing evenly. 

Mickey took a shower, got dressed, and ate breakfast. He then went back to his room and saw that Ian hadn’t moved. Mickey decided to not bother him and let him sleep, after all Ian knew he had work and they went to sleep late. So Mickey left for work already looking forward to coming home. 

That’s it, Mickey thought, he left Ian this morning without saying goodbye. “Fuck,” Mickey huffed and rubbed his eyes, of course that stupid mistake would set Ian back. The door to their room was closed, so that wasn’t a good sign. Mickey gently knocked on the door not waiting for a response and letting himself inside. 

“Ian?” Mickey’s voice was soft and careful so he wouldn’t upset Ian further. Ian visibly tensed, and Mickey saw just how red and puffed his eyes were before he turned over in the bed facing the wall. Mickey sighed and went over to kneel on his side of the bed. After a long suffering few minutes of silence, Mickey spoke, “Ian, can you tell what’s wrong? Please?” Mickey knew well enough by now what were the best ways to get Ian to talk to him. 

“You-”, Ian started then gasped a breath, starting to cry again. “You don’t love me anymore…” 

“What makes you think that, huh?” Mickey asked. 

“You didn’t- you… didn’t say-” Ian chocked out, barely able to get the words out between sniffs. 

“Is it because I didn’t say goodbye this morning?” Ian only nodded crying a little harder, his shoulders shaking. At that point Mickey leaned over and laid his crossed arms on Ian’s hip and rested his head on his arms, so that he could look at Ian’s face. 

“I didn’t say goodbye because I don’t love you, you know that. I didn’t say it because you were sleeping and I didn’t want to wake you. That’s all, alright?” Mickey assured Ian, his voice just above a whisper and rubbing his thumbs over Ian’s hip. Ian only sniffed and shut his eyes tight, trying to shut Mickey out. 

Mickey wasn’t going to give up, not over something this small. He moved to rest his chin on Ian’s bare shoulder. “Ian, please don’t let this upset you. You’ve been doing so good lately. I’m sorry.” Mickey was already tired of Ian’s illness and how much control it had over their lives. It wasn’t fair, after all the shit they went through, this was the worst. Mickey felt useless, and all he wanted to do was be happy with Ian. It seemed impossible at times. 

They kept quiet for a few more minutes, Mickey just feeling Ian slightly shake under his chin, no sign that he calmed down. Mickey moved one hand to stroke the back of Ian’s head. “Shh, it’s alright. We will get through this” Mickey whispered, understanding Ian’s pain. “I love you, Ian. I’m sorry you have to go through this. I’m so sorry, baby. I’ll always be here.” Then Mickey felt Ian stop shaking and looked over to see that the tears stopped falling and breaths coming out evenly. Mickey finally relaxed and laid down behind Ian and pulled him close and drifted to sleep. 

The next morning, Mickey was sure that he woke Ian up and kissed him goodbye. Ian smiled sleepily and returned the kiss, and Mickey decided that was the best way to start his day. 

~~

Ian was hugging the toilet puking his guts out after taking a mixture of whatever drugs were given to him and who knows how much alcohol. He was still dancing at the club and by now, taking everything that was given to him, and now that was the only way he could tolerate those pervs groping him all night. 

Tonight was unusual though, it took a lot to make Ian throw up and tonight was one of those rare occasions. Mickey was there in the doorway watching silently, because Ian pushed him away when he tried to help him. Ian was barely conscious, obviously still completely affected by the drugs. He emptied all that was in his stomach and collapsed onto the floor from exhaustion. 

That was when Mickey went to Ian to see if he had actually passed out. He wasn’t completely out, but might as well have been because when Mickey tried to talk to him and ask him if he wanted anything, Ian didn’t answer. Not having the energy to haul Ian off the floor just yet, Mickey just dragged him so he was half lying on his lap, his head against Mickey’s stomach. 

“Ian, man, you need to get up. Do you really wanna spend the night on the bathroom floor?” No answer. “Dammit.” Mickey sighed and tried to think of what to do. 

He moved Ian off of him onto the floor and got him a glass of water. Mickey was standing right beside him and nudged Ian’s side with his foot, “Yo, get up, drink this, you’ll feel better and hopefully stop tweaking like a bitch”. Ian just lifted his arm and dropped as if that was an answer. 

Mickey rolled his eyes and knelt down close to Ian. He dipped his fingers in the water and splashed Ian’s face, hoping to get anything more, even if it was anger. Ian scrunched up his face and tried to shake the water off, looking like a dog or a child. 

Then Ian started to scratch violently at every bit of skin he could reach. Mickey set the water down and took ahold of Ian’s wrists. “Fuck! Ian, would you fucking stop?!” Mickey shouted as Ian fought against him as hard as could. Mickey could barely contain Ian’s thrashing, and Ian was shouting back to let him go. Ian grew hysterical and Mickey managed to pin his arms to his sides on the floor. Angry tears were streaming down Ian’s face, and he weakly tried to get his arms free and kicking his legs. 

As mickey held him down he took a deep breath and reminded himself that this wasn’t Ian trying to fight him, not really, it was all because of the drugs. This was happening too often these days though, Mickey having to deal with a drugged out Ian only for him not remember anything in the morning. Mickey knew what Ian was doing though, he was trying to block out a part of his life right now that he would really rather not want to deal with. Mickey recognizes it because that’s what he tried to do with the memories of Ian leaving and the thought of never seeing him again. The last thing Ian wants to do now is put himself on display like a fucking circus act, but he didn’t have many options. 

Mickey felt guilty and helpless as he sat by and watched Ian self-destruct. When Ian calmed down a bit, Mickey tentatively let go of his arms and wiped away the tear stains on Ian’s cheeks. “Hey, I get it, I do, you don’t want to deal with all this shit right now, but it needs to stop, Ian. If not now, then real fuckin' soon. I can’t watch you destroy yourself much longer, it’s killing me.” 

Ian just grunted and stared up at the ceiling with deeply furrowed brows. Mickey leaned down to kiss Ian, but Ian turned his head so Mickey missed and ended up kissing his cheek. Mickey let out a frustrated breath and pressed his forehead to the side of Ian's. “You gotta snap out of this. I’ll be right here, just like I always have. Please, do this for me. I need to get you back. I miss you, baby, I just really fucking miss you.” 

Mickey heard a soft sniff and saw that new tears were leaking from Ian’s eyes. He got up and dragged Ian up with him and into their bed. Mickey just stared into the darkness realizing that Ian would forget all of what we said in the morning. 

~~ 

One side effect of Ian’s medication was suicidal tendencies. And when Mickey was sitting next to a sedated Ian with is wrists stitched and wrapped in gauze, he really wished he had taken that warning more serious. 

Ian had been in his worst depressive phase yet when he found a razor and made smooth red lines in his skin. Luckily Mickey found him, wrapped his arms with towels and took him to the ER. 

After several hours of waiting with the rest of the Gallagher's in the waiting room, they were finally allowed to see him. Ian was unconscious from heavy painkillers and seemed to have lost all the color in his skin, but his hair still bright as ever, and for whatever reason that gave Mickey hope. 

All the Gallagher siblings huddled around the bed quickly talking to Ian and to each other as Mickey watched on silently from the corner. Then Fiona gathered them, promising they will come back the next morning (or in a few hours since it was 2am). Fiona went to Mickey a pulled him in for a tight hug, which he tiredly returned and whispered, “thank you”, in his ear and left. Then it was just Mickey and Ian in the room. 

Mickey pulled a chair to the side of the bed and put his head in his hands and breathed deeply for a few moments. He broke out of his racing thoughts and looked up to Ian’s face, and his mind went clear. Whatever Mickey was thinking, no matter how difficult the situation seemed to be, when he looked at Ian he instantly knew the answer to any questions or doubts he had. Right now he couldn’t stop blaming himself that Ian was in that bed, but then he knew it wasn’t him or Ian or anyone. It was this goddamn illness that was slowly taking over the only person he would probably ever be in love with. 

Mickey took hold of Ian’s hand and with his other hand lightly touching the gauze that ran up Ian’s forearm. “Ian, I swear to you on my own life that I will protect you,” Mickey said never looking away from Ian’s face. 

“You are the first person in my life that made everything clear. I’ve never felt this free in my life. You don’t deserve this, this pain is swallowing you, and I’ll do everything I can make it go away. You just need to be as strong as I know you can be.” With that, Mickey stood up and gently cradled Ian’s head in his hands and leaned over to kiss his hair. “I’ll be back soon, baby” Mickey whispered and left the hospital only to come back in a few hours. 

~~

“Do you, Ian Gallagher, take Mickey Milkovich to be your lawfully wedded husband, as long as you both shall live?” 

“I do” Ian said with the brightest smile on his face and tears in his eyes. 

“And do you, Mickey Milkovoch, take Ian Gallagher to be your lawfully wedded husband, as long as you both shall live?” 

“Damn straight” Mickey said making some people in the audience laugh and making the priest clear his throat. “I do” Mickey corrected. 

“You may now kiss.” They reached for each other and kissed shortly, not wanting to be one of those obnoxious couples. Everyone cheered and clapped, genuinely happy for them and knowing that after everything they’ve been through, Ian and Mickey deserved this moment, this day to be happy, more than anybody. 

During the reception after all the obligatory speeches that made Ian cry, and all the stupid sister-brother dances that made Mickey roll his eyes, they finally got to have a moment and sit by themselves. They were at the Alibi, sitting in a booth that had impressive signs made by Debbie that said “Mr. & Mr.” which Mickey thought were corny but let her do it anyway because she wanted to contribute something. Ian and Mickey had their hands clasped and absently rubbing the wedding bands on each other’s fingers as they people watched. They were surprisingly a lot of people there and it was nice to have this many people care to see them happy. But despite the amount of people, Ian and Mickey were lost in each other, talking quietly and laughing, giddy that this all worked out, and despite everything they were here.

“Mickey, this is the happiest day of my life” Ian said looking at Mickey with nothing but love in his eyes. 

Mickey pulled Ian down so their foreheads were touching. “So sappy, Gallagher.” 

“Hey, you’re one of us now”, Ian said, bursting with pride. “I didn’t think it was possible to love someone this much.” 

Mickey untangled their hands to hold Ian’s jaw and let his thumbs aimlessly caress his throat. His blue eyes were honest and shiny trying to communicate all his feelings through them. He pulled Ian to kiss his lips softly, and Ian felt all the emotion behind it. “I love you so much, baby,” Mickey murmured against Ian’s lips. Ian’s face split into an impossible smile because that was the first time Mickey called him that when he was sober and fully conscious. 

Now the day was absolutely perfect.


End file.
